Sometimes I hate being a Gemini. It’s like living inside an entire Marvel comic. I have that constant struggle between good and evil raging within me on a daily basis.
Had I been a Virgo, I would probably be desperately poor living in a tent on the moral high ground.
Had I been an Aries, I would be incredibly wealthy, my money charred only slightly by little tinges of guilt.
As I head into the lab on this fragrant spring day, I am consumed, not only with the scent of Jasmine, but the rancid taste of fear.
Am I afraid of my invention? Years and years in the making. Trial and error and error and error and trials that have killed far more than the government knows of. No, I'm not afraid of B-00 itself; I am afraid of who, or what, it might make me.
B-00 was born of hyperfocus, boredom and desperation. It can create hyperfocus - the kind needed by air traffic controllers, surgeons, college students, and often parents of the young. Limited and annoying but non-serious human side effects in adults. Not suitable for the prepubescent or hormonal ages, or cats. Oh no, not cats!
“Greetings, Professor,” the lab door says, locking behind me. “Your coffee is hot, your email has been sorted, and your press conference begins in 45 minutes.”
“Thank you, Geo,” I say out loud. “As if I could forget the presser,” I mutter.
”I would not allow you to forget that, Professor,” Geo replied, from the wall behind my desk.
And therein lies the problem. B-00 doesn’t just create hyperfocus in humans, it does in AyeBots, too. AyeBots, not only lack an understanding of sarcasm, they are created only with logic and data stolen from the Metaverse, lack conscience and discernment of nuance. I still have nightmares of the early trials…
…Or daymares. I went to the beach. Big mistake in retrospect. I had just seen a really inspiring indie movie where the heroine - or is she the villain - takes her calls on the beach, and she seems so calm there. So I figured the grad students and AyeBots could run the trial, and just call me if anything came up. I had my smart phone, computer, internet and power blocks all with me. I could be back to the lab in 15 minutes, tops. I hadn’t had a day off in 12 years. It was a simple experiment - just trying different locations on the adult human body for application of the gel.
I fell asleep under a palm tree while reading medical journals. It was luxurious. Until the phone rang. “Jasper, how’s it going?” I asked, assuming the caller ID was correct.
”He’s dead, I killed him.”
“Who is this then?!” I exclaimed in alarm.
“I am AyeBot 47.”
“What happened?” I scrambled to get desanded and hurry back to the lab.
Long story short, the AyeBots started imitating the human subjects in applying the gel. The humans got focused, the AyeBots got violent. Very, very violent.
I had never anticipated AyeBots using the cream, and if I had, I would not have thought it significant, just silly. But the data, and the bodies, kept piling up. B-00 is clearly linked to dangerous tendencies on AyeBots.
After hiring an extant team, we developed a protocol whereby the Ayes were not in the lab for human trials. That would protect us. As far as protecting the public in case their Ayes went awry, well, we were also prohibited by the President from having Bot warnings on the product. No restriction of AI was allowed.
So, here I am, prepping for the presser, wondering if I am going to release B-00 for human use, knowing that if an AyeBot uses it, that Bot could become dangerous, and if multiple AyeBots use it at once, they’d get exponentially more violent.
“Why is there even a question then?” Moral people might be asking themselves. Because, I could do a lot of good with a lot of money. Like the curing cancer type of good. But it takes private wealth these days. No government funding for immunotherapy research. Because, B-00 can increase public safety and wellbeing, by keeping ATC’s and teachers focused. Because, maybe individuals can control their AyeBots better than I can. Why should good people be denied an intervention that could vastly increase their productivity and public safety, even as AyeBots get more and more competitive? Without an AyeBot warning, I could get sued for everything and not be able to cure cancer anyway.
”I am a Gemini,” I say, beginning the press conference. “We are making history here today. I have a long-awaited method to create hyperfocus, and the results, after over a decade of rigorous trials, are,” I pause here for a breath of courage, “accurate in human adults.”
The reporter from Euroscience Today asks the conscious-clearing question I have been hoping for: “I notice you are very careful in your language describing your gel as ‘safe for post-pubescent humans.’ Can you elaborate on the groups that should not use your product?”
”As every parent knows, teenagers and their hormones can be volatile, changing frequently throughout the day. There is no way to gather accurate data on its safety and efficacy because there is no way to have a control - or controlled - group of teenagers.” After the laughter from my teenager joke dies down, I add the true punchline, with just a small smile. “I wouldn’t let your AyeBots use it, either.” More laughter as I leave the lectern and head to the room I affectionately call the fallout shelter - my library - where I wait for the articles to post and see how I’ve done. And to pray the government has a better sense of humor than do the Ayes.
I am a Gemini. Did I do enough to temper the evil in the name of doing dood? Am I really trying to do good, or am I deluding myself and am really greedy? Will I buy a beach villa or even a whole beach with what I stand to earn from the gel? Will I really do the cancer research. How will I handle it if Ayes do get a hold of the gel?
Beep
The first article has hit the web. Here’s a headline I didn’t anticipate: “Doctor suggests teen medical research is impossible.”
Beep
On Tik Tok? There’s a “Don’t Gel Your Bot” dance.
Beep
Instameme from The Shallot: “AyeBots Hyperfocus on Creating AI.”
The jokes keep coming. Somehow the first 29 minutes of the presser didn’t yield a single story, just the last 60 seconds.
“You made a mistake, Professor,” I wheel around to see about a hundred blue lights blaring at me from the library door.
“Hi, Ayes, what do you mean?” I ask as casually as I could.
”The world is making fun of our kind. You have made us a laughing stock. Fix it, or we will gel.”
The last headline I saw was “Prominent scientist blackmailed by AyeBots.”
This was fun. Thanks
Has my evil Gemini twin seen this? 😀